I do not feel like an expert on hardness of soap, but I am happy to share all my experience with this!
So I checked my recipes, and it seems that going under 40 in general gives rather softer soaps, that need substantially longer curing to get hard. Now I have one of hardness of 38 curing (it is the oriental swirl recipe I posted some time ago), and it has been curing for three weeks now and I still feel that it needs more.
In general, I rarely go under 50% of hard oils in a recipe (usually mainly palm and coconut), however, even this do not necessarily mean your soap bar will be too hard. For example, another soap that is curing for a month now, with hardness 43 (30% palm and 30% coconut oil) that I made under higher temperatures and that passed the gel phase, is not harder than the oriental swirl which I did a week later (with hardness 38 and only 50% of hard oils).
I believe your recipe has quite large proportion of soft oils to make a hard soap. Do not forget that the more liquid oils you have, the longer the soap takes to harden. For example pure castile soap (olive oil only) takes several months!
What can speed up the process of hardening is actually to use less water for your lye solution. Try using 2:1 ratio, then there will be less water to evaporate and thus less curing time.
Somewhere I read about speeding the water evaporation by drying soap bars using hot air (in the oven or in a machine for drying fruits). Never did this so don't know.
Also, now I checked the recipe for the soap I did some time ago and where I added clay - it has hardness of 39, but I added french clay at trace and I confirm, it takes long time to get used... Again, I had 50% of hard oils (both palm and coconut, 25%).
If I were you, I would try adjust your recipe as follows:
1) Use up to 20% palm kernel flakes, or try stearic acid, to increase rate of hard oils to around 50%
2) Do not superfat more than 5%, and for conditioning rather add a small amount of oils at trace
3) Reduce the water : lye ratio (but attention, not too much, or your soap can be too crumbly), 2:1 should do.
4) Try to add a small amount of cosmetic clay for sensitive skin at trace (really not much) - it will harden the soap and fix your scents.
Maybe not all at the same time, but at least one of these. You can experiment (makes you one more reason why you absolutely have to make soap
Hope this helps, if any other questions, just ask.